Not every child who is involved in bullying is on the receiving side. There are those who are the ones dishing it out. This may come as a shock to some parents when they discover that their child is bullying other children.

What to do if your child is being a bully:

• Try and get to the root of why they do it. Were they bullied themselves? Do they think that by bullying others they will get back the power that they lost? Have they learnt this behaviour in the home? Maybe you should be looking at how you behave. Do you adopt bullying behaviour? Be honest. Often bullies learn the behaviour from family members. If the behaviour is uncharacteristic, could something be worrying them and that’s why they are lashing out? 
• Make sure that they know how much you disapprove of their behaviour, but don’t say that you’re ashamed of them or that you’re disowning them, even if you feel that way. They’ve got to know that it’s their behaviour you disapprove of – not them. They need an incentive to change. 
• Work out a way for them to stop bullying. Maybe they think that aggression is the best way to deal with any kind of conflict. Teach them other ways. 
• Come up with a suitable way that they can make amends for the bullying. This could be something as simple as apologising to their victim or writing an essay to be read out in front of the class. 
• Look at how they resolve conflicts within the home. This can give you a clue as to how they behave when they’re away from your scrutiny. 
• Get them to emphasise with their victim. Bullies tend to lack empathy and this is why they continue to bully. Try role-playing where you give them a taster of what it’s like to be on the receiving end for a change.

Extract taken from Bullying - A Parent's Guide. For more information on what to do if your child is being the bully or if your child is being bullied, take a look at the book - available now in eBook and printed book formats. Buy the printed version and get the eBook free!